李老师你好 这是我的作文 2015-12-13
假如你是李华,你的美国笔友Paul给你发来一封电子邮件,询问在中国关于吸烟的情况。请你给他回一封邮件,内容如下;
1. 大部分中国人已经认识到吸烟的危害性,戒烟的人越来越多;
2. 中国已通过在公共场所禁止吸烟的法律,并有多种标志提醒人们不要吸烟;
3. 希望政府采取措施帮助人们戒烟。
注意;1,词数100左右;
2,可以适当增加细节,以使行文连贯;
3,开头和结尾已为你写好,不计入总词数。
Dear Paul
Glad to hear from you. I have learned that you want to Know something about smoking in our country and Id like to answer all of
your questions.
…
Best wishes!
Yours,
Li Hua
Hearing of the massage from your letter that you want to know something about smoking in our country ,I’m eager to answer your question.
With people’s living standard improving remarkably, more addicts realize that they need to stop smoking in china. Not only do Chinese addicts start to stop smoking, but also Chinese government has began to make signs to tell people who want to smoke that smoking is not allowed in public.
I hope that our government will take more useful action to help people prevent developing the bad habit.
回复内容:(2015-12-17)
李霄鹏老师回复樊子琦:
得分:19分
首先注意句子的时态和名词的单复数问题,比如第一段中的“question”和最后一段中的“action”,我们都可以用复数的形式
其次,你能够将作文的要求用正确的表达方式发表出来,并且灵活地应用了万能句型(Hearing of the massage…,I’m eager to…/ With people’s living standard...)以及我们教过的特殊句型(Not only do Chinese…but also Chinese government…),这点非常好,能够学以致用!
最后,注意完成时是has/have+done,而不是did,所以has began应改成has begun
加油!老师期待你更大地进步!
Learn to control and meet the better yourself 2015-12-16
Being a student studying in modern society, I always hear that somebody complains about their poor lives or the past time. Comparing with them, I find that I am so lucky because I can change my lives on my own this time .
Therefore, during the limited youth, why not meet the better yourself?
To meet the better yourself , you should learn to control your lazy
Let me tell you a true experience of my own. When I was young , I did not know why I should study and whom I studied for. For this reason ,l spent a lot of time playing. As the time goes by, l became lazier and lazier even I wanted to give up studying because of the bad grade. At first , l did not pay attention to this. However , when l grew older, l found that if l did not have any knowledge, l would not win others’ respect.
Just because I want to meet my own spiritual needs,I learn to control.Then you will find that you know more and have more quality and depth .
To meet the better yourself,you should learn to control your ambition.
That means you have to stick to your goals. As ChenOu says:Even covered all over with cuts and bruises ,I have to live pretty. Although he was Influenced by all kinds of doubts, attack and discredit......,he kept on his dream.In the end,he achieved his goals successfully.
Because he didn't give himself the right to regret.he went ahead and created a new time.
In the youth of the most beautiful time we should show more of our own.Not only can we overcome difficulties, but also we can widen our horizen. Girl's youth is so valuable, only control to win more.
If we learn to control,we will meet the better ourselves
Do not you agree with me?
希望李老师批阅一下下,看看有没有需修正的地方,亦或是升级一下句子类型什么的,谢谢老师
回复内容:(2015-12-17)
李霄鹏老师回复张小芮:
同学,你好!
首先老师很高兴看到你使用了不少我们教过的万能句型( Being a student.../Comparing with them),以及疑问句(why not meet the better yourself? Do not you agree with me?)说明你上课听的很认真!
能够看出这篇作文是你自己写的,也非常用心,不过老师还是有几点问题需要指出:,先说整体问题:
1-除了我们教得万能句型之外,其他的句子能够看出你在很努力的使用高级句型,但还是脱离不了主谓宾的简单结构。因为文章写的过长,万能句型能帮助你给阅卷老师留下印象,但是简单的句子多了,作用就不大了。如果超出要求字数的话,也是容易扣分的,这点注意。
2-句子里的人称使用有些混乱。比如第一段的最后一句话是在说“我”的情况,第二段的开头又开始讲“遇见更好的你”。
3-单词的使用不够精准(如: Just because/have more quality and depth),这些地方都没能够表达清楚。“中国式英语”的痕迹较重。
4-单词的词性及单复数、拼写问题需要注意,如:control your lazy,这里的lazy是形容词,不能用在your的后面,可以改成:克服你的缺点:overcome your weaknesses; “doubts, attack”中,前者用的是复数,后者却是单数,这个地方不够细心,attack作为名词,是可以有复数形式的;widen your horizon中“视野”这个单词的拼写也需要注意。
最后,最后一句话的惯用用法是连写,“Don’t you”,不用Do not you~
Anyway, 你的学习态度值得肯定!作文的提升不是一朝一夕的,希望你加强在句型和词汇方面的应用,写出更好的作文!
老师我对视频账号有些问题 2016-01-30
老师一个账号里的视频课是固定的吗?如果我要是想听一下之前的怎么办?
回复内容:(2016-02-17)
同学您好,寒假课程的赠送视频都是与当时的实体课程相关的知识点讲解,有一定的观看期限。如果感兴趣的话,可以在李霄鹏英语工作室网站上观看更多的相关视频课程。
阅读班完形填空:C0714 (70页 2007湖南卷) 2016-02-18
文章第二行36题为什么选A? 怎么解释它的用法呢?
回复内容:(2016-02-18)
同学您好,36题的答案应该是B的,fill in for 有“临时代替”的意思,这句话的意思是:四月初的一天晚上,妈妈让我去小吃店临时顶替一位生病的员工。准确的答案尽快会发在我们的网站后台上的。
阅读班完形填空:C0718(78页 2007上海春季卷A卷) 2016-02-18
第47题为什么选D ?A可以吗?怎么解释各个选项在文章的应用?
回复内容:(2016-02-18)
同学您好,47题前面说的是年轻人戴领带的一个原因,是为了追随领导人和商业巨头的脚步并不是因为领带本身的特点的,47题后面说的是领带本身其实是有它的特点的,后面也接着解释了这些特点是什么,所以47题应该填一个表示转折的副词,即however。otherwise是否则的意思,转折的程度比however的大。您可以看看下面的这个例句体会一下。My parents lent me money. Otherwise,I couldn't have afforded the trip. 我父母借钱给我了。否则,我可支付不起这次的旅费。
阅读班完形填空:C0719(80页 2007上海春季卷B卷) 2016-02-18
文章第64题选项,这句话在文章里怎么解释?为什么选A?
回复内容:(2016-02-19)
同学您好,第64题后面应该是没有标点的。因为本文的主要内容是在讲学生的家庭作业的问题。在结合这句话的翻译:家庭作业所需要的外部资源可以看作是具有办公特点的家庭式办公室。所以答案选择A选项。
回复内容:(2016-02-19)
同学您好,第64题后面应该是没有标点的。因为本文的主要内容是在讲学生的家庭作业的问题。在结合这句话的翻译:家庭作业所需要的外部资源可以看作是具有办公特点的家庭式办公室。所以答案选择A选项。
阅读班完形填空:C0803(88页 2008辽宁卷) 2016-02-18
第38题为什么选C,而不选A。怎么解释这句话呢?
回复内容:(2016-02-19)
同学您好,通过整篇文章的通读,我们可以看出这个单身母亲其实是很称职的,所以孩子们不会认为这个母亲是因为忙才这样做的。所以答案是C选项。
阅读班完形填空:C0809 (100页 2008陕西卷) 2016-02-18
这个完形填空答案给的不对,在网上没有查到,请给我一份正确答案,谢谢!
回复内容:(2016-02-19)
同学您好,答案是21-25 DBABC 26-30 DBADD 31-35 BCCAA 36-40 BBCBC
阅读班完形填空:C0811 (104页 2008福建卷) 2016-02-18
最后一段怎么解释?尤其是第55选项选择B的解释?
回复内容:(2016-02-19)
同学您好,这段的翻译是:在美国,儿童的社会化已经成为父母和儿童双方的事,而不是父母对孩子的单方面的培养计划。因而,对父母而言,让孩子们融入社会并且与他们长时间地生活在一起,这既能给父母带来愉快,满足,也会给他们带来诸多的麻烦。
阅读班完形填空:C0902 (128页 2009全国卷2) 2016-02-18
第21题,选择B,这句话怎么理解?为什么选择B?不选择A ?
回复内容:(2016-02-19)
同学您好,这句话的翻译是:在我的成长过程中我的父亲最喜欢说的就是“努力去尝试”。我不能说我不喜欢什么事,不管这件事是什么,都要尝试过之后才知道。everything是“任何事”的意思,作者并不是每件事都不喜欢,只是有些事是不喜欢的,所以选择something。
作文:得分14分,怎么改好呢? 2016-03-04
My New Neighbourhood
Last year, we moved into a new community, it is very beautiful. There are many gardens in our community. People can take exercise or play games in it. After we moved into the community, many shopping markets were built in it. What’s more, according to my neighbour, more and more buildings are being planned to set up. In the north of community, a new park will be built. In order to help people go outside conveniently, the government is building a railway for our community.
There are so many changes in our community. I’m glad to see it because it shows that our society is developing rapidly and people’s living standard is improving remarkably and our country is becoming stronger and stronger.
回复内容:(2016-03-05)
学生你好:
1-要多使用一些高级的句型,而不都是简单句,并且要注意语法结构。如作文中的第一句:Last year, we moved into a new community, it is very beautiful. 发现了吗,两个单独句子之间没有连词,属于语法错误。
此外,结合后面的这句话:There are...我们可以这样改:Last year, we moved into a new community, with so many gardens, whose environment is so impressive.
2-注意文章的整体时态, 这句话After we moved … were built in it.是过去时,而整篇文章是现在时,我们可以这样改:As the residents in this community, we witness a lot of changes, for instance, plenty of shopping markets being built in here
3-句子内容过于重复:如 “more and more buildings are being planned to set up.” 这句话的内容就和 “In the north of community, a new park will be built.”重复。
4-可以多使用一些李老师讲过的万能句型。下面我们来改写一下最后一段:With the society developing rapidly and people’s living standard improving remarkably, I’m glad to see that a number of changes happen around us, which can prove that our country is becoming stronger and stronger.
写作课程106页,2012年高考全国卷二,帮我找找 写作中该提高的部分! 2016-03-05
Hi,Susan,
We are throwing a surprise party for Xiaoming's birthday. The party will be held from 8p.m. to 9p.m. this Friday at the students' club. A large cake which we bought will appear at the party. A birthday song will be sung together. Meanwhile, not only can you share the wonderful with us, but also you can get close to us. And then there will be a harmonious atmosphere around us. All of us prefer to play games with you because of your sense of humour. What's more, you need to carry some tiny gifts for the winners in the games. I'm eager to hearing from you.
Best wishes
Li Hua
回复内容:(2016-03-06)
1-这两个简单句,A large cake … party. A birthday song … 我们可以合并成这样:We’ll bring a delicate cake at his party, lighting the candles and singing the “Happy Birthday” together for him.
2-注意形容词后面需要有修饰的名词的:Meanwhile, not only can you share the wonderful with us,因此我们可以在wonderful后面加上time;wonderful也可以换成memorable、unforgettable
3-注意写作的语气,题目要求是“邀请助教来参加生日聚会”,所以态度要诚恳,而不是要求,命令的语气:如,下面这句What's more, you need to carry some tiny gifts for the winners in the games.我们可以改成这样:We prepare some tiny gifts for those who will win the funny games in the party, and it will so excited to see you as our honored judge.
2015年全国二卷作文,请帮忙打分,给以批改,谢谢! 2016-03-06
Dear Lucy,
With the society developing rapidly and people's standard improving remarkably,what we are faced with is a new social phenomenon that more and more people don't spend enough time sharing the happiness of the festival with their family. On the contary, they always leave their parents at the hursinghome. So, being a reenager who is responsible for the community, we should visit the elder at the nursing home during the Double Ninth Festival, which can bring them fun.
The time we set out is 8a.m. on Sunday and we will go back at 3p.m. After arriving there , the activity which is held by us is making dumplings and many performs will eb shown on for the elder. What's more, with your sense of humor, not only can we enjoy ourselves, but also the elder can enjoy the festival. In order to make the activity faultlessly, I'm eager to you to join us.
回复内容:(2016-03-08)
学生得分:19分
1-注意文章的字数,这是会影响到作文分数的。题目要求是100字左右,而第一段对这个社会现象的描写过多。重点应该放在邀请内容上。
2-有可能是家长打字时出现了错误,请注意这些问题。如: On the contary中的contrary;hursinghome 是nursing home;being a reenager中的teenager;will eb shown…中的be
3-为了提高文章的分数,我们可以把这句话: After arriving there , the activity …for the elder.这样改: After arriving there, we’ll make dumplings and cakes with elders people there as well as spend some fun time together singing, dancing, an playing games, which we hope will make them happy.
4-学生的作文有很大的进步,希望继续努力!
作文:A voilet snowstorm 得分14分,怎么 改?Thanks. 2016-05-08
A heavy snowstorm fell down from 15th to 16th. It was the biggest snowstorm in 50 years. It caused serious problems. Hundreds of animals died of the cold weather. About 50 people were injuried by the snowstorm. Electric system broke down, the flight was put off and the school was closed and so on. However, the government asked the army and the citilians to clear the snow and more and more people started to help others fix their hiouses.
Many living scenes were seen through my eyes, this let me know if everyone cares for others, our community will become more and more beautiful.
回复内容:(2016-05-08)
同学你好,作文的整体思路不错,但有几个问题需要注意一下:
1-句式有些简短,例如:It was the largest snowstorm in 50 years. It caused serious problems.这两句话可以使用高级连词连接成一句话,所以我们可以将其升级为:It was the largest snowstorm in 50 years, which caused plenty of serious problems.
2-注意单词的拼写,也有可能是家长打错了:injured(受伤),civilians(平民,市民)
3-Electric system broke down, the flight was put off and the school was closed and so on. 这句话是错误的。这句话中共有3个谓语动词,只有一个连词,要么把剩下的两个谓语的其中一个变成非谓语动词,要么加连词,这里老师建议你使用非谓语做状语,所以这里我们可以修改为:Electric system broken down, the flight was put off and the school was closed and so on.
4-第7句话中的However用在这里不太合适,我们可以用一个非谓语做目的状语的形式来连接前后的两句话:To solve these problems, the government asked the army and the civilians to clear the snow and increasing people started to help others to fix their houses.
5-This let me know that if everyone cares for others, our community will become more and more beautiful. 这句话有些中式英语的思维,我们可以将它修改为:What I know is that caring for others will contribute to our community harmony.
希望下次同学再发作文的时候能够把作文的题目写上,这样老师在修改你作文的时候能知道你是否跑题,帮助你更快的提高作文成绩!
老师您好,下面这句话您忘帮我改了? 2016-05-15
-Electric system broke down, the flight was put off and the school was closed and so on. 这句话是错误的。这句话中共有3个谓语动词,只有一个连词,要么把剩下的两个谓语的其中一个变成非谓语动词,要么加连词,这里老师建议你使用非谓语做状语,所以这里我们可以修改为:Electric system broken down, the flight was put off and the school was closed and so on.
回复内容:(2016-05-17)
同学,你仔细看一下这两个句子的区别,你的原句里是broke down,是做的谓语成分,老师给你改的是broken down,是过去分词作的伴随状语成分,Electric sysstem broke down...这句话的意思是:电力系统被破坏了。根据上文我们知道是暴风雨来临了,造成了电力系统被破坏,所以老师给你的建议是把broke改成broken